The Adventure of Imp
by BloodSuckingFerret
Summary: Prussia and America come across a little girl and make he their little sister. Fail summary is fail! First fanfic on this site. OC! Unbeta'd! warnings and disclaimers inside.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer:

Me: Do I own Hetalia?

Raven: Nevermore!

Me: Do I own Blackrock?

Raven: Nevermore!

Me: The Patriot?

Raven: Nevermore!

Me :( Pouts)

Raven: You don't own this poem, either!

Me: HOLY FREAKING COW! YOU CAN TALK? (Not Family Guy reference. Don't own that either.)

Raven: *Face palm*

Yeah, so, um I DON'T OWN ANYTHING

WARNING: Really sad at the beginning! Mentions of rape (America lets her watch Blackrock.) Slight spoilers for the Patriot and Blackrock (HALF Gs FTW!)

Ch.1

Prussia's pov

I sighed. I had to tell America that I was dating Canada. I had already told France, who couldn't really get too mad, mostly because he forgot he HAD a son. Poor Canada. At least America SOMETIMES remembers Canada. That's good. I mean, as a brother myself, I know how important that bond is. I've been thinking about brothers lately. I didn't know why. "America…" "Hang on, dude" he interrupted. How dare he interrupt the awesome me? "Who's that little girl over there?"

"I don't know. Could she be a new country?" As we got closer to her, we could see she had been crying.

"P-Paul?" She squeaked. She couldn't be more than seven or eight. "C-Carl? Where are you guys?" She might not be a country after all. "I'm sorry! Please come back! Where are you? I found someone who will recognize us as official countries! P-p-please c-come b-back!" Or maybe she WAS a country. "Oh!" She said as she saw us. "Um, I-I-I…."

"It's okay dude! Were countries too! Well, I am, he" America pointed at me, "used to be. I'm America, this," wha- he pointed again! That's rude! "is Prussia. Don't cry! We'll help you! Now, what's wrong?"

"H-hi, I'm Magrimpaland, but you can call me Imp. I can't find my older brothers, Grispaulato or Icarliwer, but I call them Paul and Carl."

"Well, we'll help you find them! What do they look like?"

"Well, Paul is a ginger, like me. He's also kind of tall and thin. Carl is also tall and thin, but he has curly brown hair. There both around seventeen, well, physically at least."

"Um, do they look like this?" He pulled out a picture of two boys that fit the description.

"YES! That's them! You found them!" America and Imp both looked like they were about to cry, but Imp was about to cry with joy, while America just looked….heartbroken.

"Um, Prussia, dude, can I talk to you for a second?" I rolled my eyes. "America, you found ze girl's brothers, just take her to zem!"

"It's more complicated than that. I did find her brothers but, well, they were supposed to meet with someone about becoming official nations, but there was a broken gas line in the building. One of them lit a cigarette and the whole place just, blew up. They didn't make it out."

"W-what?" Crap! She had good hearing. "My brothers are dead?"

After about five hours of crying, little Imp started to not only look grief-stricken, but also scared and guilty. "Who's going to take care of me?"

"Vell, maybe ve can."

"Yeah that's a great idea! I always wanted a little sister! Hey, can she come over to my house first? Pleeeeaasssse?"

"Um, sure, I guess. Kesesesese! I need to get my house set up anyvay."

"Awesome!"

""Hey, Vest!"

"Ja?"

"Get rid of all your porn, ve have a little girl moving in und I don't vant her to see it!"

"Vhat? Zis is mien house und you can't just invite little girl's over to live vith us! Und I DON'T HAVE ANY PORN!"

"Ja, you do!" Said Austria. Wait, AUSTRIA? Did he just appear out of thin air? "Now," he continued, "I miss having a little girl around the house!" "Kesesesese vhat are you talking about? You never lived vith a little girl!"

"Well, I thought Italy was one! So, Germany, how would you like me to tell Italy that you were Holy Roman Empire?"

"You vouldn't!"

"I would!"

"Grrrrrr… ok fine, she can stay, but I'm _not _getting rid of my porn…. Vhich I do not have…."

"Fine! But at least hide it! Ze awesome me vill _not _be responsible for traumatizing a little girl!"

Ok, I'm responsible for traumatizing a little girl.

I just _had _to leave her with that idiot America.

"Imp! I'm here to pick you up! Vhere are you?"

"Hi, big brother Prussia!" Aaaww! She was so cute! I just _had_ to give her a hug!

"B-big b-b-brother?" She whimpered. Without letting her go, I asked, "Vhat's vrong?"

"WAAAAAHHHH! BIG BROTHER AMERICA! HELP! BIG BROTHER PRUSSIA IS TRYING TO RAPE ME! (A/N Just keep reading, it will be explained.) What? I would never do that! That would be totally unawesome!

"Sigh, I'm on it. Imp, Prussia was NOT trying to rape you. He was just giving you a hug." "Oh, okay, sorry big brother Prussia. Um, I'll go get my suitcase." Then she ran off.

"Vhat ze hell vas zat?"

"Hehe, sorry about that, dude! We just got done watching Blackrock, so she's a little paranoid."

Oh, ok, that made se- wait WHAT? "YOU LET A LITTLE GIRL VATCH BLACKROCK? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?"

"Sorry! I was trying to cheer her up, so I put on the Patriot, and she wanted to watch more movies by "the blond guy" and South Korea stole The Dark Knight and Australia had given me Blackrock as a birthday present and I didn't have any other-"

"YOU LET HER VATCH ZE PATRIOT?"

"Yeah! It always cheers me up!"

"Do you have any idea how VIOLENT zat movie is? It's rated R!"

"Yeah, I never really understood that."

"It's rated for ze VIOLENCE!"

"Big brother Prussia?" Squeaked a little voice. It was Imp. "I'm ready!"

"Good. Now come."

"Big brother Prussia?"

"Ja?"

"What _does _happen to pretty boys in jail?"

"….. You don't need to know."


	2. Meeting new people

Disclaimer:

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I do not own Hetalia, The Patriot, The Dark Knight, Blackrock, Brokeback Mountain, this poem, or anything recognizable.

Um, same warnings as before, except no sadness this time. And a lot of swearing in German. And France (enough said.) Moral of the story so far: NEVER let America babysit. And for those of you wondering, I CANNOT tell you who I mean by "the blonde guy" that Imp has become a fan of, because that would apparently be against the rules. But it REALLY should be kind of obvious.

Chapter 2

Germany's pov

Unbelievable. This is MY house, and Prussia just invites a little girl to live with us, and when I say no, Austria blackmails me!

Unbelievable!

I sighed. Prussia explained the story to me, and I guess I can _try_ to make her feel welcome. I looked at her; she was hiding behind Prussia's leg and staring up at me. Well, she _is _pretty adorable. "Um, hi…"

"Big brother Prussia? Is he going to rape me?"

"No, Imp, he's not."

What the hell?

"Sorry about zat," said Prussia, "America thought it vould be a good idea to let her vatch Blackrock."

"Vhy?"

"Because he's an idiot. Zat's vhy. Anyvay, Imp, zis is your… um… vell, he's _my_ bruder, so do you vant him to be your older bruder?"

I froze. A little sister? I'd never been a big brother before. I've never had a sister, either. Huh. A little sister. Maybe this could work out af-

"No."

Wait, what?

"Ok zen, he vill be your uncle."

"Uncle Germany?"

"Vhat?"

"Big brother Prussia won't tell me, what _does_ happen to pretty boys in jail?"

This was going to be a long day.

Austria's P.O.V.

Where the hell is that little girl? Prussia was supposed to be here with her _five minutes ago_. He is so **rude** sometimes. Well, all the time, really. But seriously, if it weren't for me, the little girl wouldn't even be here. Germany was being a jerk and wasn't going to let her live here! Okay, maybe it wasn't the best place for a little kid, but _I _live here, I'm good with kids, and it's probably better than at that idiot America's place!

"Austria!" Oh no. Hungary. She's here. I love her, but she's _really_ not good with kids. "I just saw Prussia, and he had the _cutest_ little girl ever! Is she going to be here often?"

"Hungary, listen _very_ carefully, she will be moving here, and you may visit her whenever you like, but you may not treat her like a doll,"

"Okay!"

"Or teach her about yoai,"

"Aww, fine!"

"Or have her install cameras in Prussia **OR **Germany's room."

"I already have those!"

"Umm, o-okay. Oh look, here they come now."

Prussia came in with the little girl. She _was_ adorable! Poor thing was hiding behind Prussia's leg. "Um, hi," she squeaked, "I'm Magrimpaland, Imp for short, it's nice to meet you, and please don't rape me."

"Imp," said Prussia, "I promise you, no one vill rape you."

"Okay, sorry. I'll go put my things away." After she left, I decided to ask the question we were all thinking. "What on Earth just happened?"

"America let her vatch Ze Patriot, she vanted to vatch more movies by "ze blonde guy," South Korea had stolen Ze Dark Knight, and ze only other movie America had vas Blackrock."

"Is America really _**that **_much of an idiot?"

"Yes, he is. Now, two zings, Hungary, you may _not _show her Brokeback Mountain."

"France stole it anyway."

"Aw, _Shizzah_! He knows he's not allowed to vatch zat! Anyvay, Austria, she is _not_ a maid, understood?"

"That's okay, I learned my lesson. I know it's my fault Italy is so wimpy, I'm sorry, but now I know. Little kids are not servants."

"Very good. Oh and one more zing. Hungary."

"Yes?"

"Please take down ze cameras in my room."

"Aaaawwwwww, man!"

Suddenly, an earsplitting screech was heard. "Damn it!" said Prussia, "I told Germany to hide his porn."

Spain's P.O.V.

I'm so happy! We haven't seen Prussia since yesterday! France was almost as eager. He was going to break down the door! Silly France! We know where the spare key is!

Once we were in, we saw the cutest little girl ever! Her hair was red! Like a Tomato! Except it was too orange. "Cuuuuuuuuuuuuuute!"

"Onhonhonhon! Who is zis leetle beauty?"

"I'm Imp." She said. So cute!

"Aw, leetle Imp! So cute! So pretty! Why don't you come give ze beautiful me a hug?"

"Um, o-okay…"

"IMP!" Yay! Prussia! "Remember vhen I said no one vould rape you?"

"Yes?"

"I vasn't planning to introduce you to him."

"W-what?"

"Ja, you might want to avoid zem both. Ze Netherlands, too."

"Okay. Well, um, _fick dich, mutterficker!_"

"_**VHAT?" **_

"I heard Uncle Germany say it. He says it means 'goodbye, I'll see you later!'"

"It doesn't"

"What does it mean?"

"It's bad vords zat you shouldn't use!"

"Ok. Oh, um, mister blonde person?"

"You can call me France!"

"Mister France?"

"Oui?"

"What happens to pretty boys in jail?"

"Well, what happens is-"

"_**FRANCE IF YOU FINISH ZAT SENTENCE I VILL RIP OFF YOUR VITAL REGIONS! Und give Hungary her copy of Brokeback Mountain back!"**_

"Fine!"

After that both of them left.

"¡Hola, little girl! My name is- owowowowowowow!"

I guess Prussia _hadn't _left after all!

I'm sorry it's so short! Please review and you will get a hug from Prussia! (Flames will be given to Italy to cook Pasta!)


	3. But it's Fiday!

Ummmmm, hi… I know it's been awhile, but I've been _very _busy. And had writer's block.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of the Call of Duty video game. Or PewDiePie (though I _**AM**_ a bro!) I do, however, own Magrimpaland.

Prussia's P.O.V.

"Come on, Imp, ve have more people for you to meet!" I sighed. What is taking her so long?

"Big brother America, do I _really_ have to shoot the doggies?" _**What?**_

"I guess not, but if you don't, they'll attack you and your team."

"You're right, you're right. Whoa! Headshot!"

"Nice!"

THAT DOES IT!

I pounded on the door. "America, I know you're stupid, but PLEASE tell me you are not letting a little girl play Black Ops!"

"Of course not!"

"Good, vell, she still needs to-"

"It's Modern Warfare! Really Prussia, get your Call of Duty games straight!"

"ZAT IS NOT BETTER! YOU ARE STILL LETTING A LITTLE GIRL PLAY A VIOLENT VIDEO GAME!"

"S-sorry…"

"Big brother Prussia? Can I wear pigtails?"

"Fine, but look in ze mirror vhen you brush your hair."

"Okay!"

After she had left, I turned to glare at America.

"VHAT ZE HELL VERE YOU ZINKING? SHE IS A LITTLE GIRL! I can't leave you alone for five seconds, can I?"

"Would it help if I told you she's really good at it?"

"No!"

Suddenly, an earsplitting scream was heard. We ran to see what was wrong.

Imp's P.O.V.

There's someone here. I can see her. She looks like me, but older. She does everything I do, and she's inside the mirror.

"Imp! Vhat's vrong?"

"Big brother Prussia! There's a ghost inside the mirror!"

"GHOST? WHERE? Prussia, dude, do something!"

"America shut up! Imp, relax. It's just your reflection."

I froze. That's me? But…how?

"Th-that CAN'T be me! She's too old!"

"…. Imp, how old vere you zis morning? Physically, I mean."

"I was three. How old am I now."

"Vell, I zink you're about seven, almost eight."

"Aw, dude! I know what happened!"

Wait, big brother America knows something? But so many people have been telling me how stupid he is, and I've only known him about five hours.

"When her brothers… passed on, the land was added to her country, so she grew!"

"But our age isn't decided by ze size of our land."

"Well, I don't know any other explanation, do you?"

"…Nein….."

"Well, I guess that's what we're going by. Now come on, Imp, I got a surprise for you!"

I smiled as I ran out the house.

Prussia's P.O.V.

….. A ferret? Granted, it _was_ a cute ferret, but seriously, a ferret?

"Aaaawwwwww, he's so cute! What's his name?"

"Well, he doesn't have one, so YOU get to name him!"

"…I don't know."

"Well, we'll worry about that later. Right now, let's go meet Canada."

-Time skip-

Canada's P.O.V.

"Mr. Kumajojo! Don't eat all the pancakes! We have guests coming!"

"Who are you?"

"I'm Canada!"

I sighed at my pet that will _never _remember who I am. Well, to be fair, I never remember his name, but still.

"Big brother Prussia?" Oh! They're here!

"One minute, Imp, ve're almost zere."

"Uh, Prussia, dude, Spain and France just called… They're on their way here."

"Vhy?"

"Something about it being 5:00 and Friday…"

"_**VHAT? **_Nonononononono. I zought it vould be obvious zat Naked Friday vould be cancelled!" Wait, what?

"Guess not."

Naked Friday? Really? I mean, I knew the Bad Touch Trio was…. Well… but Naked Friday?

I opened the door and was immediately glomped by an excited Prussian.

"Birdie!"

"H-hi Prussia."

Suddenly, Spain appeared, and all hell broke loose/

"Hola, amigo!"

"Spain! Vhat ze hell are you doing?"

"Sorry Prussia, but Naked Friday is Naked Friday!"

"Zere is a little girl here!"

"She can join us! It will be f- ow! Imp! It's not nice to hit people with a rake!"

"Yeah! Big brother Prussia! I did it! Dats how I roll! Dats how I get to da ladies!"

"AMERICA! DID YOU LET HER VATCH PEWDIEPIE?"

"Ummmmm…."

"Yeah he did! Brofist!"

It was going to be a long day.

**A/N: Wow. This chapter is short, and kinda bad, but I tried! Hey, on the plus side, **_**you guys**_** get to pick the ferret's name! Just p.m. me ideas and I will use the one I like best! Oh, and if you review, you become awesomer! (I don't care if awesomer is a word or not.) Flames will be used to make smores! **


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